The Prisoner

AMC has the entire run of Patrick McGoohan's The Prisoner streaming online.



If you are a person, I recommend that you watch them.

Be seeing you.

Where Is Everybody?

London, Christmas Morning, in the Twilight Zone.

Wind Waker

Okay, I know. It's a video of a kid on Youtube making music. There's only, what 9 trillion of those? But this guy's version of the theme from the Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker is gonna knock your socks off.



By the way, we played through Wind Waker as a family about a year ago (Thanks, Don!), and it was a real treat. Until we started punching each other in the stomachs to see if coins would come out. Then it got painful and upsetting.

Happy Holidays!

Press ALT-F9 to enter Holiday Recovery Mode.

Back to work today. Had a good Christmas.

The kids have hit the post-Christmas wall, where they realize they've played with all of their new toys and games, and they're going to have to go back to inventing their own ways of entertaining themselves.

Kate enjoyed having Dad home, but particularly because Dad's a big help when playing Lego Star Wars.

Conner was much more affectionate, and would spend time just sitting on Dad's lap, giving hugs, and saying "Love you, Dad." He couldn't care less about what presents he got, he was just glad the old man was around.

Sariah was bursting into gleeful squealing whenever I was around, she was so happy to see me. But she was too busy walking all over the place to spend time snuggling. Young and mobile professional walker.

Wife got new books for Christmas, so I didn't see her that much. I think her Christmas was Merry.

Santa brought me a new sleeping bag. Finally watched the Dark Knight and liked it. Got some writing done. I may have a self-published comic in print in a few months.

Really didn't want to come in to work this morning, but woke up and got showered and dressed anyway. I'm on office-drone autopilot today, but I'm looking forward to more comics writing tonight.

The Most Comfortable Cultist Robe You've Ever Worn.

Or your money back.

The Snuggie.

There's no reason to be cold while you're performing human sacrifice. Those dungeons can get a bit chilly.

(Thanks to the Wife-Lady.)

I Ran Today...

... and didn't die.

Also, I must be like 17 years old now, because I really like Vampire Weekend and I can't help it.



Screw you, your indie music sucks more than my indie music.

Career Change...

Oh, this is brilliant.



Minotaur China Shop.

Play it here, it's free, and Flash.

Get out of my brain, HAL.

OH CRAP.

Computers can now read our minds.

The human race is doomed.

...

Seriously, though, this is magnificent. Should make corporate espionage so much easier.

Oh, Virtual Server, Why Do You Disobey Me?

Hm... that about sums up my thoughts today. Maybe I should be using Twitter instead.

Windows Server 2008 is... problematic. Extremely secure. As in, Fort Knox secure (for now). But clunky. What do I like? It's got all of the functionality of Server 2003... and that seems to be it. No, I'm kidding, I do really like the Core Server implementation, that was very needed. But other than that, it's Server Vista Home Edition. So, meh. Hopefully it gets better.

Did research last night for Local Comic Project, was very productive.

Will run tomorrow, when I'm feeling more well. Well-er?

Double-plus well.

No Running Today

Starting to get sick. Throat sore. Illness is here a week early. Next week would be much more convenient. Will shoot for running on Friday.

Writing. Need to get current project off of plate completely. Script needs major fixing. The dialogue is crooked and hurts my ears when I read it out loud.

Old project still not completely dead, no matter what I do. Colorist still slowly turning in pages. Tempted to take what I have and just submit it, forget the last three pages.

New short taking shape. Eight pages? Shorter?

Trying to blog more. I read too much and speak, uh, not enough.

KANEDAAAAAAAAAA!

Flickering Screens

I've been thinking about video games lately. Not gaming in general, but the specific games that I carry around in my head with me. There are games that I spent time playing on my Commodore 64 as a child that I still think about.

I've been trying to list the games that have stuck with me, and figure out what makes them "sticky."

Here are the trends I've noticed:
- I like action.
- I like humor.
- I don't like persistence. MMORPGs give me a sick feeling in my stomach.
- I like excellent writing.
- I don't like sampling a large assortment of games. I'm extremely picky. I find a title I'm interested in and dive.
- I love hybrids: FPS/RPG, RTS/RPG, FPS/RTS, etc.
- I'd still rather dig up a good old game than the latest AAA title.
- I expect a great amount of polish from start to finish. One broken element or ill-considered mechanic can be a deal-breaker.
- Squaresoft didn't get a single title on my list.
- Lots of First Person Shooters.
- Very few console games, mostly PC games.

I'm not seeking for Greater Truth about my gaming habits. I've only been thinking about why I'm attracted to some games and not others, and why.

Shrug.

I think I need to find a copy of Herzog Zwei. I miss that game.

Chocolate and Sugar

I got a candy bar from work today. It was for my birthday. I'm not a chocolate enthusiast, but I'll eat the stuff.

I was feeling pretty down about my chocolate gift, but I started thinking about how much power the substance has. And not just chocolate, but candy in general. The military puts Hershey bars in their K-rations. Why is that? In the 1800's, pioneers would give their kids lumps of brown sugar to suck on. We have an entire holiday devoted to candy. If my kids are having a rough time, I offer them a piece of candy, and they cheer right up. Sugar makes us happy. Somehow it has the magical power to warm our hearts.

When I was in Mexico, I lived in a town called Los Mochis for over a year. There was a sugar processing plant in the middle of town. The plant was the city's spine. The city was founded because of the existence of that plant. Workers and farm equipment would harvest the sugar cane, and truck it to the plant. After the sugar was extracted, the cane was incinerated, and cinders would fly up out of the smokestacks. For weeks, black and grey ash would snow on the city. The entire community lived or died by the sugar crop.

(By the way, the cane sugar is the good stuff. Most of the sugar produced here in the U.S. is beet sugar.)

"Sugar is poison" is the old saying, and part of my brain is ranting about diabetes and hyperactivity and obesity and empty calories. And chocolate is messy. I rarely let my kids touch chocolate, because just cleaning them up afterward requires a sand blaster. I should be making a hand-painted sign to wave around: "Sugar is killing us!"

I was feeling down about chocolate.

Then I ate the whole candy bar. I felt a lot better.

I'll go running tonight.

Happy Black Friday

Or, you know, Unhappy.

... To Me.

Eh, Why Not?

Watch some old clips of Peter Schiff. That's right, you morons, laugh him down. Look at him, all wild-eyed and nervous. What a whackjob. Go ahead, giggle when he tells you the fundamentals of our economy are a mess.



Oh, wait.

There's probably some apt analogies to draw between Austrian school economists and Old Testament prophets, but today's Friday. I'm not going to do that to you.

Have a good weekend.

(Building my ark.)

Alex Garcia P.!

My good friend Alex Garcia Palomares just launched his new portfolio site, and I'm pretty stoked for him. I really dig the site design/animation, and he's got some original pencils from Decayed Orbits up there in his samples.


This guy is a seriously talented illustrator, and you should give him your money. He's a professional. I can't give a greater endorsement.

Congrats, Alex!

Stan The Man

He's still nutty, but you gotta love the guy. I grew up with Stan's bombastic wording. My vocabulary would be a fraction of what it is today if it weren't for Stan Lee's thesaurus.

And you gotta love that he's pushing a book for the Hero Initiative.

Committment

There are two types of folks. Those who will sit through the entirety of Flash Gordon (1980) out of a warped sense of childhood nostalgia, and those who won't.


Unfortunately, I appear to be the first kind.

I beg of you, don't be the first kind.

Ziplock

So, the wife-lady had an organ removed this past week. The stitches are hurting the poor dear, so I'm contemplating the installation of an easy Ziplock access port on her in case of future surgeries while sealing in Freshness. People cutting up my wife makes me cranky.

So I'm married to a sweet lady minus a gall bladder. Also minus a handful of painful gravel. They don't make replacement parts, so I can't take her back to the dealership.

Sweet Wife is recovering nicely, and thinks she's still Wonder Woman. I have purchased a cattle prod. Every time Wife goes to pick up Baby (which she is NOT allowed to do) I shock her. We've been doing this for about a week now. The Pavlovian response still hasn't kicked in yet. She still hears that baby cry, her arms go all outstretched like a zombie reaching for brains, and ZAP. Daddy brings the castigation.

When you get organs removed, you don't get to pick things up.

AT ALL.

That has made taking care of baby much more interesting for Dad, because that means I get to be the one pulling the kid out of the crib for latenight feedings. Two AM. Crying. Daddy picks up baby, carries her over to bed for feeding. Ten minutes later, Daddy picks up baby and places her back in crib. Repeat.

The older two have been much more complacent. Peanut butter sandwiches and early Halloween candy have been the staple since last Tuesday. The children are still functioning normally, with only sporadic seizures.

Yes. I am an awesome Father.

Fun Fact: Did you know Vicodin makes you sleep, like, all the time? It does! Did you also know that it invokes acute envy from your insomniac spouse? You betcha!

That is all.

Time Machine Plans: SCRAPPED

Okay, I could handle raptors. I was fine with T-Rexes and tremendous bugs.

But this has ended all of my dinosaur-hunting fantasies.

Fossil find may document largest snake (Science News.org)

12.8 meters?

...

Oh, hell no.

Moving to Australia

I've been the victim of an elaborate con for the entirety of my 30-something years.

I'm moving to Australia. Taking the family, gonna buy some motorcycles and weapons. Then we'll scavenge oil and food for our livelihood. [edit: Also, we're going to start a rock band.]


Screw your system. Your system is busted.

See you round.

Lego Zombie Apocalypse

These guys are achievers.

WTS: 3 Bed 2 Bath, Great Neighborhood

Seriously, who needs homeowners insurance? Build them cute, but durable. Housing development for the End Times.

419

From here:

Dear American:

I need to ask you to support an urgent secret business relationship with a transfer of funds of great magnitude.

I am Ministry of the Treasury of the Republic of America. My country has had crisis that has caused the need for large transfer of funds of 800 billion dollars US. If you would assist me in this transfer, it would be most profitable to you.

I am working with Mr. Phil Gram, lobbyist for UBS, who will be my replacement as Ministry of the Treasury in January. As a Senator, you may know him as the leader of the American banking deregulation movement in the 1990s. This transactin is 100% safe.

This is a matter of great urgency. We need a blank check. We need the funds as quickly as possible. We cannot directly transfer these funds in the names of our close friends because we are constantly under surveillance. My family lawyer advised me that I should look for a reliable and trustworthy person who will act as a next of kin so the funds can be transferred.

Please reply with all of your bank account, IRA and college fund account numbers and those of your children and grandchildren to wallstreetbailout@treasury.gov so that we may transfer your commission for this transaction. After I receive that information, I will respond with detailed information about safeguards that will be used to protect the funds.

Yours Faithfully Minister of Treasury Paulson

Huh.

I got linked by Larry Young, who evidently stumbled across this post.

AIT/PlanetLar's official response: "That's us, all right: the counterpunch to 'You're screwed.'"

Now to convince him to make that their motto.

I don't think I mentioned it, but Larry was one of the folks that kindly accepted one of my Decayed Orbits ashcans. I mentioned it had Astronauts. Larry asked if they were in Trouble. I told them they were in Deathly Peril. He responded that they shoot for Astronauts getting Into Trouble, and then Getting Out of It.

Oops.

Good company, good comics. Buy books from Larry, he's nice and makes cool stuff.

FOMC

Now David Walker isn't the only one saying it:

We are screwed.

And the Fed cannot save us.

Decayed Orbits Ashcan

Oh, if you wanted a PDF version of the Decayed Orbits preview ashcan, it's here.

SDCC08 Saturday

Got moving a little late, slept in a bit. Got to the convention, hit the floor some more.

After a bit, headed to the Dave Gibbons Watchmen panel. I wasn't sure to expect, I'd always a majority of Watchmen's success to Alan Moore. He's just attracted so much more hype than Gibbons. I was wrong. Dave Gibbons is a bloody savant. He's promoting a "making of" book called Watching the Watchmen, and it is freaking gold. It's packed with his old sketches, thumbnails, and notes related to the book. He kept everything. It's all there, and it is astounding. I think it's out in October. Christmas present for Daddy.

Howard Chaykin panel: two great thoughts that I recorded:
"Don't take the praise or the blame seriously, it leads to an easier life."
"As technology arrives, embrace it and use it."
Those nuggets of wisdom were stuffed in the package, and a horde of F-bombs served as the styrofoam peanuts. There was no gift wrap.

Will Eisner Tribute Panel - Paul Levitz, Denis Kitchen, Michael Uslan, and Carl Gropper. The driest panel I attended. You've got the frickin' president of DC in there, how can you be dry? Memories of Eisner, which all seemed to revolve around food. Breakfast at SDCC, steaks, dinners. Maybe they were hungry. But Kitchen was the only one kicking out any decent anecdotes. People are remembered by the stories told about them. It degraded into a hype session for the Spirit movie, with reassurances that Frank Miller wasn't going to screw it up. I coughed, covering my mouth with my fist. I looked at my hand and it was covered in chalk dust.

Lettering panel - You know how boring the last panel was? This was the complete opposite. Todd FRICKIN' Klein, Tom HOLY CRAP Orzechowski, Jared Fletcher, and John Roshell, with Doug Wolk moderating. A bunch of guys at the top of their game talking comics. Fonts, sound effects, logo designs. Script problems. Proofreading. As boring as it sounds, this panel was fascinating. If you weren't there for this, you missed out, it was an intro college course for making your comics look right. So glad I didn't miss this.

Back to the floor.

Oni panel - Started late. Actually not too big of a problem, because very few people were there. There seemed to be more people working for Oni present than fans. They gave a rundown on all their new books coming out, and opened for questions. Nothing major really popped up on my radar, they've got some solid books, but nothing I'm really itching for. Wasteland and Scott Pilgrim are the only Oni books I'm really following. The panel ended on time, even having started 20 minutes late. Blame the lateness on Attack of the Show. G4 douchebags.

Writing Panel - Peter David, Colleen Doran, Maggie Thompson, Orson Scott Card, Brian Miller. Pretty close to a similar panel last year. Card had some more extremely valuable general writing advice. Colleen seemed even more agitated than before. Peter had some great anecdotes. Worth seeing, but not a grand-slam.

Don and I grabbed our same spot as last year to watch the Masquerade procession. Very few noteworthy costumes this year. Only took a couple photos. Mostly enjoyable for the euphoric surreality derived from watching a tidal wave of fans marching in unison, as far as the eye can see. It's disturbing and fun all at the same time. Don had to write up some articles for Gamespot, so I went the anime room. Watched one episode of Death Note, and was thoroughly disoriented. It was unintelligible. I think it's supposed to have a story, but I have no clue what it is. Anime fanboys and girls can send me your hatemail. Perhaps the manga is better.

Ate food. Slept. Drove home the next morning. Was happy to be home.

Friday

I should have mentioned that Wednesday night the car parked behind us got broken into. Don heard the smash and tink of broken glass, loud enough to wake him up.

Friday morning revealed another car break-in. Another bullet dodged.

From my journal that day:
"San Diego feels like a city that's faking it, that's blatantly dishonest, like the facades might come down at any moment and it'll be standing there with its pants around its ankles."

Downtown SD is so polished, with skyscrapers and joggers and folks walking their dogs. It's the paradigm of wealth and health. But drive down the wrong street, and the image cracks, like bad reception on your TV. It's a pretty place, just don't go anywhere outside of downtown. More on this later.

Got to the Con Center.

Spent most of the morning on the exhibit floor. Met people, handed out ashcans. Bought some presents for the family.

Tried to get in line for the Spaced viewing around noon. Nothing doing. The line was interminable. I ended up outside, down the rear steps, behind a few thousand people. I relented and headed towards the hall holding the Dr. Horrible panel. Got in just fine, caught the tail end of the Stargate panel. I don't watch Stargate, so I read and wrote.

Dr. Horrible panel - Just absolutely hilarious. Those folks are just as funny unscripted as they are onscreen, if not more so. My fanboy geekout for the day. Or at least one of them. Joss is my master now. Just find the Youtube footage of the panel, I'm not going to waste time trying to do it justice.

The Webcomics Weekly guys and Phil Foglio - Just excellent brainfood. Kurtz and co. get schooled (in a good way) by Girl Genius creator Phil. I don't read PVP, but Scott is genuinely funny in person. At one point he was discussing the reaction he gets when telling syndicated cartoonists about giving his work away for free. He then pantomimed the front of his imaginary tuxedo rolling up like a windowshade, his monocle popping out of his eye, and his bowler flipping on his head. I broke up. In general, the entire panel was school. Phil pulled out sales numbers, his justifications for working with retailers and Amazon, and lots of wisdom. Dave Kellen provided historical perspective on one-on-one entertainment which was very insightful. Just a solid, entertaining, and educational panel. Great stuff.

The Image Panel - Fairly awful. The big announcement was a crossover book with all of the original Image heroes drawn by their creators. It looked jarring and uninteresting. I left after about 20 minutes.

Colleen Doran's Creator Resources panel - Sad anecdotes and irritated looks. Colleen did her homework. It was like watching a Jesuit trying to bring Christianity to a troop of apes. She did an excellent job, and I learned a lot. Sometimes she can seem a little too quick to anger, however. It's a convention, it'll all turn out okay.

Hit the floor some more.

Tried the line MST3k reunion. Impossible. I think at this point we ate at Dick's Last Resort. Headed for the Eisners.

The Eisners are painful to watch. Frank Miller seemed unprepared. Not a natural public speaker. That wouldn't be a problem, except he had the keynote. A disappointment.
The best moments were the Fabio Moon and Gabriel Ba acceptance speeches for 5 and Umbrella Academy. Those guys have electricity coming from their fingertips. They are not tired of comics. They love comics, and you could feed on that enthusiasm. It takes some guys from Brazil to tell America what we're doing wrong with comics. There's your "future of comics" right there.

Left early to attend the Spaced screening. Participated in a 2000-strong imaginary gunfight. Watched some Spaced, and laughed.

After the Spaced viewing, Jeremy and I headed for the car. We passed a couple of drunk twenty-something party girls, feeling their way down the sidewalk like they were lost in a cave.

Drove Jeremy down south to his hotel in Chula Vista. The closer I got to Tijuana, the more uneasy I got. The last place I wanted to end up was Mexico at 1am. Found his hotel, dropped him off, managed to avoid a couple of wandering hookers. Couldn't reconcile the excess in SD and the rundown vibe of Chula Vista. Shrug. Relaxed a bit when I got back on I-5, heading away from Mexico as fast as I could.

Drove back to SD, but the GPS provided some inaccurate instructions which led me down to the harbor. Empty streets, traffic lights, and lots of water. It was a GTA3 moment, sitting in the car, staring out at the water, with no one else around. I could have found some crates to smash through, or a cool ramp to jump off of into the bay.

Or I could just get back to the hotel, which I eventually did.

Better day than Thursday, I think.

More Thursday

- I bumped into Walter Koenig. At least I'm pretty sure it was him.

- Hit the Pitching panel with Mark Waid, James Lucas Jones, and some other editors. Mark Waid wants to crush your soul. Not really. Good panel, and a good splash of reality.

- Attended the excellent Graphic Novels panel moderated by Larry Young. Matt Silady's DIY sensibility is inspiring. Just make your stupid comic book and screw everything else. Just do your thing, and get better at doing your thing. It served as the counterpunch to the "You're Screwed" sentiment at the Pitching panel. Pretty much everyone on the panel was making comics because someone forgot to tell them not to. Gotta pick up the Homeless Channel now, the dude was just so refreshingly upbeat about comics.

That was Thursday. I went to the hotel, ate, and slept.

SDCC 08

Let's have a few words about San Diego Comic Con.

Wednesday night highlights:
- Grabbed a copy of Channel Zero from Brian Wood.
- Berated by Brian Azzarello for not posting more on Standard Attrition.

Thursday highlights
- Got sketches from Geoff Darrow

- Hit the J. Michael Straczynski writing panel, which was a good jumpstart for the con. Got me in the right headspace of "student" instead of "fanboy."

- Caught the last half of DC's Superman panel. Now I know everything about Krypto the Superdog, and I'm a better person for it.

- Caught the Xmen panel with Fraction, Jason Aaron, and a bunch of other X-creators. Axel Alonso and Brubaker were AWOL. Takeaways: I have no friggin' idea what X-men is about anymore. I took copious notes for my buddy Don who could not attend. We went over the notes later, and we both agreed that they were unintelligible. Something about... superheroes... we had never heard of. Although Jason Aaron's new supervillain in Wolverine who can punch people in their soul sounded like a good idea. That was the only point that hooked me during the entire hour.

-Entertainment Weekly did a panel on comic book Visionaries. It was the nexus of all comic book worlds contained within one room. Grant Morrison, Colleen Doran, Mike Mignola, Matt Fraction, Jim Lee, John Cassaday, and Robert Kirkman. It had the potential to wipe Southern California off the map, but overall it was a disappoinment. The moderator was a kid, and her questions were inane. If she was familiar with any of the creators' material, it wasn't apparent. It degraded into long uncomfortable pauses and nervous joking. The one flash of insight came from Grant when he discussed how superheroes are the only future-oriented American archetype, while cowboys, gangsters, etc. are all past-oriented. Worth it to see them all in the same space, but a missed opportunity.

Dr. Horrible

Joss made a musical.


Teaser from Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog on Vimeo.

The Anatomy of Hilarity

Ren and Stimpie storyboards from John K.

5.12 China

Comics of the Earthquake

Jigsaw

I was thinking about jigsaw puzzles, cognitive surplus, and broken window economics.

I became very frightened.

Don't worry, though, I think I'm better now.

Oops.

So, I've been forgetting to cross-post updates to the Decayed Orbits workblog.

Fixing that.

New inks up over there.

Doesn't everyone use RSS nowadays?

Superheroes

Got a pile of comics for the kids on Saturday. Conner's a big Spiderman fan, and ate up the Marvel Adventures free comic.

Reading comics with the boy is fun, but requires some translation. He's still getting the English thing down.

Our heroes:
Man-man = Spiderman
Man = Hulk
Ine Man = Iron Man
Deet Deet = Ant Man

Not sure where he got Deet Deet from, but it's got something to do with the antennae, I think.

Why is this weekend going to be so awesome?

First, tomorrow is Free Comic Book Day.

Second, as of an hour ago, Team Fortress 2 is free to play until May 4. Easily the funnest team shooter I've played in the last couple years. Go download it and shoot some people.

Have a good weekend.

Clay Shirky

Crowdsourcing guy:

Stimuli

Dave Barry explains the economic stimulus program here:

"Be sure to mail your return in a timely manner, because this year, filing taxpayers will receive an Economic Stimulus Payment. This is a very exciting new program that I will explain using the Q and A format:

Q. What is an Economic Stimulus Payment?

A. It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

Q. Where will the government get this money?

A. From taxpayers.

Q. So the government is giving me back my own money?

A. Only a smidgen.

Q. What is the purpose of this payment?

A. The plan is that you will use the money to purchase a high-definition TV set, thus stimulating the economy.

Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China?

A. Shut up."

I'll take that future. No, the one to the left. Yeah, that one.

I had the privilege to hear Syd Mead reminisce about Blade Runner last year. Someone dug up some old illustrations he did for United States Steel about what the future would look like.

I like Syd's future. I'll take that one.

Revisions

Crowdsourcing Time Travel.

Love it.

Science!

Decayed Orbits

Decayed Orbits has a workblog. And it's here.

I honestly don't know what a workblog is, but I have one, and if you click on it, you can see things.

The Long Tail of Destruction

NIN is making serious money.

Between this and Radiohead's In Rainbows release, I think the math is pretty clear. The music industry as it stands is virtually obsolete. Any musician with half a brain is going to figure out that they're leaving money on the table. If you're tied to the music industry, or any creative industry, figure out who your fans are quick, and speak directly to them.

Also, read this piece about the Long Tail and True Fans. You don't need a million fans. You need one thousand. Just make sure you take care of them.

Fail save vs. Death Magic

Gary Gygax passed away.

Dungeons and Dragons and the various other incarnations of RPGs helped me, in all seriousness, survive high school. DnD gets a bad rap, but some of my fondest memories are from roleplaying sessions with good friends. The night of my Bachelor Party (ugh.) was a knock-down, drag-out, laughing-on-the-floor gaming session with friends and brothers, rather than a creepy, uncomfortable evening of stag films and strippers.

I gamed instead of going to Prom.

Screw Prom.

I played DnD for the first time when I was eight years old. From then on, I pored over Players Guides, DMs Guides, and Monster Manuals for years.

Fantasy is an escape, roleplaying is a shared hallucination. It serves a purpose. Very few people can handle living in the "Now" every waking moment. We need fantasy, and we need play some of the time.

Gygax is on the list of people I owe, but I've never met.

Sixty-nine isn't a bad age to go, but everybody wants more time.

It was fun, Gary. Once the party and I get some gold together, we'll go find a high-level priest and get you back in the game.

"We're reading the Bible, Mom!"

Switching Jobs.

Put in my two-week notice, and I'm signing up with these guys:

Mall Ninjas

...

Do I love Sketchup?

Yeah.




Yeah, I do.

Serling.

Rod Serling on writing, commercialism, and censorship.

http://youtube.com/watch?v=wX5Ysz3lOv8

http://youtube.com/watch?v=kuZaTgC-ZcE

Delays

I hate waking up in the morning and realizing that we were supposed to have manned expeditions arriving at Jupiter seven years ago.

Slackers.

Do I need to kick you in the stomach...

... to make you read Fell?

It's a comic.
It makes your cop show look like Captain Kangaroo.
It's two freakin' dollars.

Stop being a dummy and go get Fell.

Oh, by the way...

Joel's back.

You may want to wait a couple days to hit their homepage, their server is getting KILLED.

But check out the BoingBoing post in the meantime.

Sometimes you realize:

This world is just too darn full of brilliant people.

This guy is one of him. Seriously, check out his site.

Double DEATH!

Overheard from the next room, where my daughter is playing MarioKart Double Dash (amongst anguished cries from Mario and Princess Peach as they are driven repeatedly off of a cliff):

Daughter: I'm sorry! I'm so sorry!

Flight

Spacey Space

NEXT: Comic Book LARPing

I love this.

Another great gift idea.

I KNOW WHAT DADDY'S GETTING!

I've been especially good this year.

Dude.

Check out this dude's Legos.

End this. Now.

Hasn't there been enough suffering?

Son of a...

Ever since this XKCD comic came out, my brain has been rickrolling me about once an hour.

Freakin' freak.

Why does this crap happen to me?

(Update: Currently brainstorming ways to use this to foil the plans of those who hate freedom.)

You Monsters.

Movies that Joss Whedon was going to write, but now we'll never see because of the Writer's Guild strike:

1) The Man With The Golden Thing
2) Seven Brides For Seven Draculas
3) Avenging Benji
4) Don’t Pick At It – Oh God, What’d I Just Say?
5) The Cars That Could Turn Into Robots But No, It’s Different
6) Wonder Woman
7) Cheese For Frieda

Please, Big Hollywood Conglomerates, just give them anything they ask for. We've already lost too much.

This has got to stop.

WWFCND?

THINGS THE PUNISHER WOULD NEVER DO

Excerpt from the next Batman movie:

Batman, Master of Timing

Sorry.

We apologize.

Or, as we say in our house, "Oopsie Poopsie".

No biggy, right? Until it's you they're bundling away.

You're only one or two small coincidences away from unlawful combatant status.

Please, make it stop.

I am completely unable to refrain from scanning my spam folder. There is a worm in my brain that is constantly shouting "What if you miss a message from someone important, and they're just not added to your safelist yet?"

I can't let go.

I can't let go.

Please, let it stop.

Special Update:

I'm in Los Angeles, and I hate it here.

Sorry.

I forgot to exist for the past eleven days.

If I haven't written or called, I'm still around, just busy.

Hope you're all doing well.

It's full of stars...

Amazon just killed everyone.

This is insane. Book publishers, music studios, film studios, comic publishers. I seriously think they all just got killed by the internet.

I want to feel sorry for all those suckers, but it's looking like Amazon just did something right, and did it better than everyone else could have.

Why would I need Diamond distribution anymore if I want to self-publish a graphic novel?

What's going to stop anyone from distributing their own indy film on DVD?

What's going to stop a band from putting their own CD out, and linking to Amazon from their myspace, rather than getting screwed by a label?

POD just got funky.

Compartmentalizing

So, I've been feeling extremely scattershot lately in respect to what I'm working on and what my goals are. I'm all over the place. It's been like that scene in The Great Dictator where Hynkel is going from room to room, posing for paintings, playing piano, approving military inventions, romancing the secretary, running the government, etc.



I'm supposed to be in three different places tonight.

So I've been trying to break everything up, and attack things in chunks. I haven't been entirely successful, but I've been making a little progress. I've got two new scripts underway, I've got some ads out for artists, and a whole pile of ideas that I need to get rid of. Right now it's just an ongoing process of elimination: goal-oriented stuff stays, everything else goes. I'm seriously considering a significant alteration of my web presence.

I'll get it figured out eventually.

Yay!

FINALLY, the future is shaping up to be something I want to be a part of:

'Spider-man' suit secret revealed

Back from East Coast.

Status: Not Dead.

Takehome from Warren Ellis Panel:

Three words:

Fatal Robot Cosplay

List

Here's my list of people I got to see/meet/hear at Comicon 2007, roughly in order:

The DC writing crew, notably Dan Jurgens, Paul Dini, Dan Didio
Syd Mead - Blade Runner
Ray Bradbury
Ray Harryhausen - Superpanel, watched 20 Million Miles From Earth
George Romero - Diary of the Dead - FANTASTIC Panel, great
Max Brooks - Zombie Survival Handbook - One of us.
J. Michael Straczynski
Peter David - Writing panel, valuable event, great H. Ellison anecdote
Orson Scott Card - Writing panel
Maggie Thompson - Comic Buyers Guide
David Petersen - Mouse Guard
Warren Ellis - Nuts, but hilarious. I got the last question at the panel!
Maddie Greene - The Engine, very kind.
Ben Templesmith - Fell, 30 Days of Night - Very Australian
Jonathan Hickman - Nightly News
Brian Wood - DMZ
Dan Curtis Johnson - Chase - Had a great lunch and conversation
J. H. Williams III - Desolation Jones, insane art Skillz
Lauren McCubben - Like everyone's crazy aunt, very sweet
Grant Morrison - Off-planet
Geof Darrow - Busy drawing
Art Adams - Busy drawing
Mike Mignola - Busy drawing
Matt Wagner - Busy drawing
Sergio Aragones - Saw him walking around
Jeff Smith - Nearly crashed into him on the exhibition floor
Jim Lee - Image Panel
Todd McFarlane - Image Panel
Erik Larsen - Image Panel
Jim Valentino - Image Panel
Mark Silvestri - Image Panel
Rob Liefeld - Image Panel
Whilce Portacio - Image Panel
Robert Kirkman - Walking Dead
Charlie Adlard - Walking Dead
Ryan Ottley - Image Booth
Frazer Irving - Gutsville - SUPER friendly guy filled with awesome
Rob Schrab - Scud
Mike Oeming - Image Panel
Matt Fraction - Casanova
Kelly Sue DeConnick - 30 Days of Night, too nice for words
Tycho and Gabe - PA - CAN'T DESCRIBE HOW AWESOME THIS WAS
Mark Evanier - The Eisners
Gene Simmons - Wandering the floor
Jennifer Love Hewitt - Wandering the floor(?)
Josh Hartnett - 30 Days of Night - SCARIEST PREVIEW EVER.
Sam Raimi - 30 Days of Night - He's hilarious in real life too.
Joss Whedon - Women love him.
Brian Posehn - Image panel
Gerry Duggan - Image panel
9000 Teenage Girls with "FREE HUGS" signs - EVERYWHERE.

Too many great experiences, anecdotes, advice, and stories. Information Overload.

Photos.

Heya, here's my San Diego Comic-Con 2007 Flickr set.

Enjoy. I'm not a photographer.

This is probably my favorite shot.

I'm realizing now that I shot a lot of Star Wars shots, which wasn't wholly intentional. I think it's because most of the Star Wars costumes belonged to a select group of cosplayers that realized that they needed to cover their shame.

Seriously. The fishnet stocking market must have gone through the roof last week.

Crisis on Infinite Cons

So, I'm burning through the first wave of con reporting, and it looks like I went to a different con than everyone else.

First off, we had a blast. Face-hurty hilarious fun. Great trip.

I got some pictures, which are awful. I'll get them on Flickr tonight.

I will try to rip through as many panels and things I got into as I can before I get tired of it. The whole weekend was nuts. Also, I lost six pounds.

I'm really tired, but glad to be back within hugging range of the wife and kids. Hugs 'r gud.

More later, fear not.

Oh, right.

San Diego Comic-Con is this week.

Wait. You mean it's tomorrow?

Uhhh. Maybe I should get ready.

And then Captain America opens a Gelato stand...

This is pretty nuts. I consciously avoid superhero comics, but I have been digging the heck out of (Marvel Comics executive editor) Tom Brevoort's blog.

This was fascinating:

The original pitch for Marvel's Civil War.

Also recommended are his series of "Comics I Screwed Up" posts.

DING DING!

GO RYAN!

Ryan Hamilton's Last Comic Standing Audition

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Oh my brain.

SDCC has released their programming schedule:

http://www.comic-con.org/cci/cci07prog_peek.shtml

I'm frantically beginning the process of cloning myself. There's no way I'm going to get to everything I want to see.

I'm getting tired just thinking about it.

Of Note:

In another lifetime, I was in a comedy troupe at Ricks College. We were called the Whigs. I performed for a semester, I think. Then I met a girl and my comedy career promptly ended.

Ryan Hamilton was in that troupe with me, I think he joined at the same time I did. We auditioned together. Impressions: very nice guy, super fun to improv with, and extremely funny. I probably haven't spoken to him in 13 years.

Here's Ryan now:



He'll be on Last Comic Standing on NBC, Wednesday July 11.

http://www.ryanham.com/

Break a leg.

I can't complain.

I won't deny things are difficult. But things slowly improve.

For example: my son has grown a full set of eight magnificent teeth. If you could only see the sheer unadulterated joy on his face when he bites someone, you'd plainly see life is packed with brilliance and beauty.

When you've got teeth that you can use to bite people, what do you have to complain about, really?

Life is fantastic. Go bite somebody.

Present and accounted for.

You should probably take a look at this:

Into the Pixel art exhibition

So yeah, what's been going on?

Good things. Family is fine.

Comics: Reading some fine comics. Gutsville is insane. DMZ is still noteworthy. Criminal is so filled with amazing comics that it makes my teeth hurt. Madman is suitably weird. Looking forward to Black Summer, more Fell, more Walking Dead.

Film: Finally saw Casino Royale. My review: pretty good, much less slutty. Also, watched Donner's Superman and the Secret of NIMH again. Excellence and nostalgia, great stuff.

Games: We (as in, the family) finally got around to beating Legend of Zelda: Wind Waker on our dusty, mostly-unused Gamecube. It was very positive. The children would rather watch Dad play Zelda than watch TV, which is interesting. Wife wants more Zelda. I'm taking a more serious look at family-oriented gaming than I have in the past. It's much more rewarding when you can share the fun.

Music: I don't know why, but I can't stop listening to Freezepop these days.

So that's the summary of my consumerism for the past month. Consuming instead of producing. Yes, I do feel badly about it. I promise, I'm repenting.

Coming up:
Will be in San Diego for the Comic-con from July 25-29. Let me know if you need me to pick up anything, sketches, swag, Warren Ellis DNA samples. I have it on good authority that everyone in the known universe will be there. Everyone.

Will be in Virginia August 6-14.

That's everything. Have a good Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.

Curse You Bendis!

So, Wife-Lady picked up one of the Ultimate Spiderman issues I grabbed for the kids from the quarter bin.

She's hooked. She wants to start picking up the trades. That and she's wanting to pick up the Madman Gargantua hardcover, because she's been dying to read the whole run.

And she's saying she's wanting to hit the cons with me.

She's read some of my comics in the past, but it hasn't been sticky. She liked Peter David's Incredible Hulk. She was mad that I only picked up the first issue of Whedon's Serenity.

Now I have no idea what our home will be like. Never in my wildest dreams.

I have a comic wife, and I don't know what to do about it.

Morally Obligated.

I should post this. My brother Troy and some friends created a pitch for a TV show for a class project. He came to me for story ideas, and I threw him this one:

(Warning: the acting will hurt you, but the premise is there. In Youtube terms, this stuff is Shakespeare.)



It's very unsettling to talk about an idea one week, and see a video of it the next. I think I'm going to outsource all of my story ideas to college students from here on out. Never underestimate the power of a class project deadline.

Sorry, blog.

Been busy. Been sick. Been playing with kids. Been working. Been watching movies. Been reading. Been commuting.

Been is an odd word. Look at that spelling, it's a mess. Been. It's like the name of a Hanna Barbara superhero's sidekick. Gleep. Been.

Forgive me, blog. Why must we drift apart? Maybe something interesting will happen, and we'll have more to talk about.

Until then, I'll see you when I see you.

Now I know something's wrong.

I'm so sick/sleep-deprived today that both of my eyes are twitching nonstop. Either permanent nerve damage, or... permanent nerve damage.

That kind of weekend.

Sweet.

Friendly Reminder.

Tomorrow is Free Comic Book Day.

Go get yourself some goodies.

I may as well just quit now.

Best Story Idea Ever.

Was His Name-o.

APE BINGO.

Encyclopedia Brown and the Case of Too Many Piercings

Saaaaaaaaan Francisco.

So, APE travelogue.

-Made the drive down to San Jose Friday night, met up with Herr Donkeljohn.
-Crashed.
-Woke up, ate delicious waffles, got ready.
-Missed the train. Played Forgotten Worlds and Sonic the Hedgehog on Don's still-functioning Sega Genesis. Shooting and Fighting.
-Missed the train again. Ate some lunch, decided to walk down to the train station and loiter.
-Rode the train, arrived at APE. It was quickly apparent that I'm not "indy" enough for APE. I knew that long beforehand, but the immediate confrontation with reality drove it home. Don and I basically wandered aimlessly, hoping to find something cool.

for (int i=0; i<999999; i=i+1)
{
LookAtBooth();
SearRetinasWithPoorlyDrawnImagesOfChicksBathingInBlood();
ScrubBrainByThinkingOfBunniesAndDaisies();
MutterUncomfortableSarcasticComment();
MoveToNextTable();
}

Don's quote really summed it up for me: "There's only so far you can get with black and red."

I don't really have problems with goths, I just stick out like a sore thumb when they congregate. It's not that I don't want to talk to them, it's that I'm too square for them to talk to me. Shrug.

So that was the negative.

Positive points:
- I did find some really neat cartoonists who were more in the funny animals (bathed in blood! no, I'm kidding.) genre. I will definitely be checking out their websites.
- Caught the art spiegelman/Franciose Mouly panel, which I really enjoyed. There was a neat discussion of using the whole page of a comic like the old Winsor McKay Little Nemo Sunday comic compositions, rather than just thinking of comics as a sequential group of images. Comics versus storyboarding. Worth the cost of entry.
- We randomly ran into Dan C. Johnson and Don introduced us. Chatted about kids and the iPhone.
- Got Runnerguy a Jim Mahfood sketch (It's coming). We kept stopping by his table and he'd be gone, or eating a burrito, or something. Finally, I just stood posted at his table like a guard at Buckingham Palace until he noticed me. Nice guy.

Highlights from the trip back:
Discarded thong on the street.
Drunken guy swaying and singing in the train station.

In summary, the trip was a success!
Many thanks to Don and family for food/shelter/one-liners!
------------------------------------------
Mission objectives completed: 100%!
Secrets found: 5/5!
You have unlocked a new weapon!

Done

The script for issue one is Done, heaven help me.

Just in time for APE.

I am so great with arbitrary, self-determined deadlines.

Oh, right, the title.

The book is called Decayed Orbits. Three issue miniseries, 22 pages per issue. Maybe.

Time slows down as you reach the speed of stupid...

APE is this weekend, and I will be there Saturday. Driving down Friday night.

We rented Nausicaa of the Valley of the Wind. Daughter's one-word review: "Cool!" I agree with her. Heavy environmentalism, lots of action, outstanding production design. It's a film you'll wish you could see the concept art for. The plot is iffy, but it's okay. Dubbed voice work by Patrick Stewart, Edward James Olmos, Uma Thurman.

If Miyazaki's environmental epics are like the Star Wars Trilogy, Nausicaa is A New Hope. Castle in the Sky and Princess Mononoke are Empire and Jedi. No, she hasn't seen Mononoke.

There's shooting in it, more than I expected. It's not ultraviolent, in fact it is very toned down, with very little blood. Daughter has finally associated guns with killing, which I'm not too concerned about. She made a gun out of Duplo blocks and shot me. She called it a "Boom" and told me I died. I agreed with her. We've been cautious about violence around her, and I'm just thrilled she got to age three before she figured it out. She's a very kind and helpful soul. Violence isn't part of her persona, but she digs a good action scene. She's very into drama.

Noob Runner stuff: My legs are falling off. I've almost beaten my college time in the mile and a half run (and I weighed a lot less then). I'm running between 2-3 miles per day. What's good for shin splints? I keep giving myself time to heal, and then they return whenever I push myself. Stretches, treatments, suggestions?

Still here.

I'm still here, just very busy.

Highlights: Potty training, running, trying to find quiet moments to write. Hoping for at least an hour tonight.

There was Easter in there somewhere.

The System Hates Dick Dale.

Screw it.

I was reading Mike Allred's The Golden Plates last night with my daughter. My boss lent them to me, how cool is that?

There's a beheading in the first few pages. It's not like I was surprised, I'm intimately familiar with the content.

My previous post. I am not going to worry about violence in my writing. I've been listening to far too many pacifist wusses for too long (including the one in my head).

As long as it's going somewhere, and not violence for violence's sake.

Now that I've clarified that to myself, I feel so much better.

My script is so awesome and so sucky. I kill people in my head.

I don't know.

Looking over my script, I'm seeing people getting shot and blown up.

I really don't hate people. I'm pretty sure I'm going somewhere with all this.

In my head, this whole story was a lot more James Joyce. Now it's like playing in the ball-pit at McDonalds, only the balls are all hand grenades.

I'm a little concerned, but also secretly pleased that my script is so cool.

Yes, I know. It's going to suck. But it will be so cool while sucking.

Maybe I need to stop watching 24.

Final cleanup, then ready for being ripped apart, I swear. It's "done."

Now it needs to be Done.

BANNED: Anvils, mallets, firearms, light bulbs, and butcher knives.

Me: "Why aren't you asleep?"

Daughter: "There's a mouse in my bed."

Me: "Really? Let me check it out."

Me: "I don't see anything, honey. Are you sure?"

Daughter: "Yes."

Me: "Where is he?"

Daughter: "Right there."

Me: "Hm. I don't see anything. Wait, is this an invisible mouse?"

Daughter: "Yes."

Me: "..."

Me: "Okay, what's his name?"

Daughter: "Jerry."

Me: "Of course it is."


Thank you, Mr. Quimby. Thanks a ton.